dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
