You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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