I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
