I bet he comes in French.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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