you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
