Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
