Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
