white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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