I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
