Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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