You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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