O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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