As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize