if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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