I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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