I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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