apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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