You're completely useless in the revolution.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
