This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
