I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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