thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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