PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
