Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
