Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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