got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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