I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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