Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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