You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
