with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize