New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize