Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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