White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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