I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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