I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
