Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
