Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
