Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
