I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
