Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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