Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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