he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
