Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
