porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
