yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
