good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
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