dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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