And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize
