Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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