Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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