I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Alive.
So much puke
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
