i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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