I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
