Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
