did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
